My Latino Papi

Posted: June 17, 2010 in Dating in the City

I don’t even know where to start. It’d be great if I can encapsulate all that has transpired in the last 36 hours and write it in text, but I can’t.

The last 36 hours was one of the most magical moments in my life.

Tuesday night, I suddenly had the urge to go to a bathhouse. Normally, I wouldn’t have because the week had just started and I wasn’t particularly horny or looking for anything in particular. It felt like something  compelled me to go, or that I needed to go… I flirted with a few guys yes, but didn’t really do IT with any of them. I was about to leave at 9:30pm when someone arrived. It looked like it was his first time inside, because it was funny how he looked at the facilities; he was like a baby seeing everything for the first time. In the dark areas he would try to feel his way around as if he were blind. But the moment he entered, our eyes met. And I said, to hell with the MRT, I want to get to know this guy.

He was around 5’8, shaved head, lean swimmer’s body. He’s got small beautiful eyes placed a little deep in his skull. He’s got sideburns that join his beard and his mustache. He shaves it such that there is a lining of hair around half a centimeter thick growing from his sideburns to his jaw to his chin and there’s also a small patch of hair under his lower lip. His mustache is also connected to his beard vertically by hair carefully shaved from the inside under his lips. This was a fine specimen of a man.

So I waited for him to get settled. And the bathhouse dance began. At first it I was following him and then he was following me, and we’d stop somewhere and do it all again… after 15 minutes we finally stopped moving in a dark niche section. I didn’t know how to start the conversation, but I did, luckily, in English. Because he didn’t speak Tagalog.  He was Brazilian.

He has been staying in Boracay for a month and was only in Manila to look for a connecting flight to Puerto Rico,which is where his sister is. At first we were just talking about his stay and how much fun he had in Boracay then we moved on to the, according to him evil-looking beggar girl  that wanted to pull down the glass window of the taxi he was in. He apparently gave 40 pesos worth of coins to another beggar which prompted this girl to come to his taxi.  And in his rage, he bit the little girl’s fingers. That should have taught her a lesson.

We talked for an hour and I was surprised as to where this guy was coming from. He’s just 31-years-old, street-smart, very strong and straight-forward. He’s been working since his teens and has been traveling around the world since he was 8. He did not finish school; he said he’s only probably read 3 books in his entire life. But by the way he talked, I’m sure he knows more than someone with a degree. He would talk about how American society, since he’s lived in the States for 5-6 years, was designed to let the ‘cultural minorities’ think they ARE ‘minorities’, and how the system was in place so that they (blacks, mexicans/latinos, asians etc.) would fight each other. He discussed about how ignorant some people are, like the President of Bolivia saying on National television that if you eat chickens you become gay. Or how Fidel Castro, who some see as an assassin, considered by some a communist, has made Cuba a better place. In his opinion, having been to Cuba himself, people in Cuba are happy, unlike what the rest of Western popular society says. We came to discuss history, and how a person must first see, feel and hear before he believes something, which is why he says he does not believe in history because every time it is written, it can be changed, depending on who writes it. He does not believe in God, rather he believes in Nature, and that it has provided him with everything he needs and has placed him where he needs to be in the proper place and the proper time.

I was in awe. I was fascinated by this man. It was getting really hot so he said, let’s go down and take a shower. I took a different cubicle but he asked me to join him in his. It was probably the most exotic shower show that bathhouse has ever seen. People were coming in and out of the showers just to see us soap each other and hug and kiss. That and to see our weeners, his weener was probably the largest uncut weener within a 10km radius. He said that he loves my lips, he even asked me where I learned to kiss. Believe it or not we stayed under the shower for an hour kissing passionately and just talking. He describes me as a ‘beautiful man’, and he thought he wasn’t my type, and I thought vice-versa because it was as if we were chasing each other around earlier. So he asked me if we can go to somewhere more private, so I led him up to a vacant room.

We did it. We kissed, we hugged, we felt each others’ bodies. And in the heat of the moment he tried to enter me. He was HUGE and he was only able to get his head in. I stopped him because I’m an advocate for safe sex, I went down to get condom and lube but I was surprised to know that he already came. Inside me. If this happened to me 2 years ago, I’d be freaked out of my wits and unable to socially function. So a lot of stuff went through my head, like I can get sick with HIV and all that. I thought maybe this guy was just using me for sex and all or was he just out to infect people. After that we hit the showers again which made a lot o f the guys watch us. I forgot how I injected HIV into the conversation because he said he gets tested every year, and that there’s a mandate in Brazil where you have to. He said, ‘I’m sorry Papi, for not telling you I came. I was just in the heat of the moment’. After that we left the bathhouse together, and he wanted to eat. We ate at Andok’s because he loves chicken. He was telling me that why’d he have to meet me thousands of miles away from home, and now apart from the evil little beggar girl, he now likes Manila and he wants to stay. He asked me ‘Where have you been all my life?’. Don’t know if he meant it as a joke, but I felt a hint of sincerity. He said then, “Can I see you again tomorrow, for lunch?”, I said, “I can’t I have work, but I can meet you for dinner”. So we decided to meet at 6pm the next day. He gave me his address, showed me his passport and the hotel where he was staying. He also got my cellphone number. He didn’t have a cel so I explained there are only a few landlines that can call a cellphone. He said, “Don’t worry, I’ll find a way, I’ll call you tomorrow before 6”. It was already 1am and he said I should get going, since I still had work. I let him take a cab first and waved goodbye.

I took a bus home. I was thinking about all of what just happened, my romantic night with this rare guy, the implications of the sex we just had, and being the jaded fool that I am, I was already letting him go and thinking the worst. I said to myself, “He isn’t gonna call”. Just as when the bus approached Edsa Ayala, my phone rang. Private Number. And then I heard his voice. He said, “Hi, just want to let you know I’m safe and sound. Are you home?”. I said “Not yet, still on the bus, so lets see each other tomorrow?”. “Yes, see you 6pm, goodnight”. That put my heart somewhat at ease.

So the next day I was very anxious. He told me that he’d give me a call around 6pm. I didn’t get much sleep and the wait was excruciating. It was 4:50, when a Private Number made my phone ring. It was him and he was already checking where I was. I logged out from work, took a cab and raced to his hotel. The next few hours were awesome, we strolled around the Mall and talked more about what he does and how even I can come visit and see him in the States. If you ask him what he does for work, he’d tell you he can do anything: Wash the dishes, launder clothes etc. He is not the elitist foreigner type who’d insist on the finer things in life. He’s fairly simple. And we bought some small wallets for his nieces, a big blouse for his Mom, as we strolled around Robinson’s Manila. He was also excited to wear his shirt from Obra ni Juan for his flight the next day and his sandals that had the islands of the Philippines embossed on them. We ate at a Persian restaurant that served us real great food that our mouth still stank of garlic the next day, even after brushing. But we still kissed anyway. He said,”I won’t leave if you tell me to.” But I knew he had to, and soon. I didn’t want to keep him in this country where he has no work and his family is waiting for him.

We woke up at 4am. Good thing I was there because the lobby receptionist was asleep and unable to give the wake-up call. When the alarm rang he hugged me and I hugged him so tight. We didn’t say anything but we both knew that we didn’t want to part ways. He said, “I’ll be back. I’ll come visit you Papi Chulo”. We exchanged emails so we can keep in touch; he doesn’t know how to use IMs.  He also gave me one of his undergarments (and amazingly, they fit) “So that you’d have something from your latino boyfriend”. I was surprised that I could connect with someone who’s from a different culture that easily. I even had a deja vu, when I was putting on my socks. I haven’t had a deja vu for a while now, and when I do, I feel like I am on the right track. That God or the universe has led me inevitably to this moment…

On my cab ride home, a tear started to form in my eyes. He’s the closest thing to a boyfriend I’ve had in years.

  1. GM says:

    It’s nice to encounter people who makes you feel special. Someone to make you feel that you got something that nobody else can see but him. Oh i hope this one works silversplinter. At least for now, the vibe is good. Hope this one cures your heartaches for good.

  2. poi says:

    natawa ako sa encapsulate at first. i thought i’d be reading computer jargons and what-nots. 🙂

    i’m sooo happy for you 🙂

  3. Thanks guys! And my Papi just emailed! He’s now at Los Angeles because his flight from Hong Kong got cancelled… Man, I thought it’d take a while before he replies to my email but he just did!

  4. M says:

    how are you two now?

    • We’re actually doing good. He still loves me and makes sure I know that everytime we chat on facebook. He’s actually not giving up, he’s saying that he’s doing everything he can to be able to see me again, which is sweet. The union is actually fighting for him and his job since he’s been with that company since he was 16, so… being in the States has its privileges 🙂

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